On my journey towards Total Life Prosperity I’ve met so many amazing like minded individuals that support this blog and inspire me to be who God has destined me to be. One of those individuals is one of my previous Guest bloggers- Carmen. She has recently launched her new blog: God, Men, and Money: dedicated to her three sweet spots!

I had to share her site with my readers so be sure to show her some blog love!  I commented on her latest hilarious post: 3 Reason’s Why It’s Awesome You’re Single. Definitely check her out!

For a bit of comic relief check out this hilarious video

Spotted at A Belle In Brooklyn

Related posts:

1. Blog Love: Diddy Blog Coming Soon!
2. Love Lockdown: Black Churches Are Why Black Women Are Single
3. Love Lockdown: How to Date and Stay Saved + GIVEAWAY!

During my usual morning blogroll I came across an interesting event; Together Apart presents Skin Deep: Bubble Butts, Big Muscles & Superficial Secrets Of Successful Relationships hosted by one of my favorite bloggers, Demetria Lucas of www.abelleinbrooklyn.com. During this 3 hour event panelist will delve into the question: “How Does Your Appearance Affect Your Dating and Relationships?”

This live conversation has been designed for singles and couples to receive expert beauty tips, fitness info, fashion solutions and practical relationship advice that will help them to attract and keep their Mr. or Ms Right. I thought this event was such a coincidence because  just the other day I was just having a convo over BBM with my hometown buddy Darryl about relationships. We were discussing  different topics about relationships that would stimulate dialogue among men and women about…something like a battle of the sexes. (If you haven’t already, make sure you check out his blog Ashy2Classy.net  and read his Marcus Graham Chronicles where he shares his personal issues with women, love, and relationships.)

Anyway, one of the topics that immediately came to my mind while we were chatting was how important looks are in a relationship; and the female vs. male point of view. This topic is overlooked in my opinion. If I was going to be in New York July 30th, I’d definitely be attending this event! I’m curious to know if other people think the way I do. I know people say looks don’t matter, its all about what’s on the inside, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, blah, blah, blah! I don’t buy it one bit! Call me superficial but looks certainly matter. The first appearance is what initially attracts you to someone. While I refrain from calling people ugly, I do believe people can always make themselves more attractive. Whether that be a certain hairstyle, makeup, clothing, diet/excerise, etc. its all about presenting yourself at your absolute best at all times! In terms of my relationship, we have an understanding that we will do everything in our power to look our best for each other. I have to parenthetically insert that I make sure I look good for myself, but I get an exhilarating rush when my man notices I added a extra lil’ something to my beauty routine just for him! I don’t understand how women (or men) get in relationships and let themselves go. All the things you did when you were single to gain the attention of a man should be more exaggerated now that you have him. Women are quick to remind men: “do what you did in the beginning to get her, to keep her” but they fail to take their own advice. I highly recommend those in the New York area to make plans to attend this event.

Together Apart presents Skin Deep: Bubble Butts, Big Muscles & Superficial Secrets Of Successful Relationships

Friday, July 30th 7pm – 10pm ( doors open at 6pm)
Spike Lee Screening Room  (Long Island University Brooklyn Campus)

Hosted by Essence’s Magazine’s Relationship Editor, Demetria Lucas (abelleinbrooklyn.com) & Star of The Bruce Willis and Queen Latifah produced film “The Hip Hop Project” ,Chris ‘Kazi’ Rolle (chriskazirolle.com)

Expert Panelists: Celebrity Hair Stylist: Ursurla Stephens(ursulastephen.com); Celebrity Make Up Artists: Andrea & D’Angelo (beautytechniquestogo.com); Celebrity Groomer: Glenn ‘geedabarber’ Wilson (geedabarber.com); Celebrity Trainer: Joe Trainer (joetrainer.org)

Purchase tickets at www.together-apart.com

Check out the video!

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1. Love Lockdown: Social Networking & Relationships
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If you haven’t heard of him by now, I invite you to follow Public Speaker, Best Selling Author, Lifestyle Columnist, Style & Etiquette Impresario, and Contemporary Gentleman Enitan Bereola, II. known on Twitter as Bereolaesque.

[BE-RE-O-LA-ESQUE] -adjective

Highly appealing to human senses or mind providing pleasure or delight esp. in appearance or manner; pleasing; charming; alluring; attractive

Clutch Magazine recently complied a list of the Top 10 Men to Follow on Twitter but they left him out. I am a firm believer in giving credit where credit is due, and this man deserves his credit! Some days I want to retweet his entire timeline. They are always on point! and most importantly he is a man of God that shares his wisdom with the world. This author believes that chivalry is NOT dead! In his book,  Bereolaesque: The Contemporary Gentleman & Etiquette Book For The Urban Sophisticate he covers topics ranging from how to properly carry yourself at social engagements, why you shouldn’t flaunt your riches, social etiquette, why you shouldn’t kiss and tell, and, of course relationship advice for men on how to deal with women.

 Here’s what the critics are saying:

“Class is subconscious. Style is inherited. Bespoke is a state of mind. The commonality is that they are all in choice. This book teaches you to be exceptional in every way.”

Aaron Arnold
CEO, Music Is My Business
Former member of Sean “Diddy” Combs’ executive team
“CNN deemed Aaron ‘Diddy 2.0′ because of his style”

Before doing my research on this guy I assumed he had to be unattractive (#dontjudgeme) but then I saw this video on his website and I was pleasantly surprised that he’s easy on the eyes! Check him out!

Check out his lastest article on Soul’cial Independence SoulTrain.com

Follow Him twitter.com/bereolaesque

Related posts:

1. People to Follow on Twitter: Tony Gaskins Jr.
2. Love Lockdown: How to Date and Stay Saved + GIVEAWAY!
3. Love Lockdown: 5 Signs the “Ship” is headed in the right direction

It is my goal that every reader of TotalLifeProsperityBlog.com experience wholeness in every area of life. Recently, I had a chance to interview rising fashion stylist Apuje Kalu, who was willing to share his story about his journey towards Total Life Prosperity. Without sounding cliche’, Apuje was extremely easy to talk to and down-to-earth. I’ve been following his work with photographer Elton Anderson for some time now and I know he’s going places. When we talked I joked that I was jumping on his bandwagon early before he blows up. I wish him nothing but continued success! *Special thanks to my dear friend Kelle who e-introduced us when I moved to the DC area.

About Apuje

Apuje (A-Pooh-Jay) is a freelance fashion stylist from Washington, DC. As a self proclaimed lover of PORK bacon and connoisseur of Red Velvet cake”, he took a giant step of faith leaving his IT Consulting job in corporate america to pursue his passion which is a career in Fashion.

sidebar: If you’re wondering why PORK bacon, read his Open Letter to Pork Bacon

So why did you leave corporate America?

After 6 years in corporate America I knew I was leaving due to lay offs. I had the option to stay with my IT  Consulting firm but I opted to accept the severance package.  In hopes of mixing my interest in fashion with my Engineering degree, I envisioned a career in luxury goods brand management or marketing. Instead of looking for a job I planned to attend graduate school and get my MBA. In the meantime I made myself available to work on photo shoots with Elton and other photographers. Grad school eventually got postponed and one day I mustered enough guts to say I’m going to really pursue freelance styling and I did it.

Who has been your biggest supporter since leaving corporate America?

My mother has been my supporter since day one. Besides her, making myself available to work with Elton has been rewarding. He has been extremely encouraging and supportive considering we share a similar background…both of us left well paying corporate jobs to pursue our passion. In addition to my mother and Elton, I know I couldn’t do it without the support of my fellow FAMU alums. FAMU has a strong supportive network of people who support the work on their own.

What advice would you give to someone who wanted to follow in your footsteps?

The hardest thing to do is to start.  If you have a dream start to visualize it and put forth a real effort to live your dream. Even with 40-50 shoots under my belt, it still wasn’t a reality until I start saying, “I am a stylist.” Once I visualized it and verbalized it I realized this is what I am. I am living out my dream of being a fashion stylist. I’d also tell people to have a skill set to fall back on. For me its my Engineering background.

What would be your “dream” job ?

Style correspondent on E! or Creative Director for a luxury fashion house like Chanel

What inspires you?

Everyday things and people. I am a people watcher…The airport and South Beach are great places to observe the style of everyday people.There are times I see a person and make up an entire story in my head about them based on how they look. For photo shoots I try to evoke emotion and tell a compelling story by using patterns, texture, and color. I follow a few Fashion blog sites and I pay attention to fashion spreads in GQ , Glamour, Cosmopolitan, and Seventeen magazines.

Any upcoming projects you’re looking forward to? 

Nothing in particular because projects come up all the time. I have a go-with-the flow kind of attitude so I keep my schedule open to fly to New York, Miami, or LA frequently… but I always have engagement shoots and test shoots with modeling agencies.

What does Total Life Prosperity mean to you?

 My definition of Total Life Prosperity is very similar to the vision of your blog. I attribute my prosperity this year to my faith in God. Instead of worrying and trying to force things, I’m allowing him to move. I have to be honest, some test shoots don’t pay alot of money and times have been hard but my relationship with God has kept me grounded.  when you have a relationship with him he provides totally and everything falls into place; like a domino effect.

Check out more of his work at apujekalu.com and follow his blog

Here are some past shoots that I absolutely LOVED! Whenever the beau decides to put a ring on it I’m hiring Elton & Apuje! iDig their work!

Photo credit: Elton Anderson

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1. She Does Makeup: Interview with Atlanta Makeup Artist Alexandra Butler
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3. Prosperous Links

Where would I be without Twitter! I have found tons of resources, blogs, and websites to follow via Twitter and the latest I want to share with my readers is a successful Author, Life/Relationship Coach, Motivational Speaker, Mind Coach to several athletes, Screenwriter, Film Producer, and Consultant Tony A. Gaskins Jr. I may be late to discover him (apparently he has been on Oprah and Tyra) but I’m glad I did!

This might seem stalkerish but I had to share the Tweets that made me Follow Him

Favorite Quotes from Tony

“I woke up this morning only to realize that God was working on my behalf even while I was asleep”

“The good thing about feeding our mind is that we can eat food for thought all day and never gain weight”

“We don’t live a yesterday or a tomorrow because only what we do TODAY counts”

“A person only hates you because they hate themselves. Knowing that, love them anyway”

“In the midst of evil choose to do good, in the midst of hate, choose to love. Your life is your choice”

“In order to get it all, we must be willing to GIVE it all”

“Knowledge only becomes POWERFUL when applied”

“If you can’t run the race, then walk it just as long as you finish it”

“You’re only as strong as your weakest thought”

“Your life is a movie script, any scenes that don’t move the story forward cut them out”

“Make sure those in your circle do push-ups, not pull-ups”

“Even when life deals you a weak hand you should never show it”

About Tony

Gaskins focuses on enlightening and inspiring every person he meets, that is his ultimate goal. While most want fame and fortune, the only thing Gaskins wants is a voice. A voice to speak up for the voiceless and to speak into the lives of others. To help propel the voice Gaskins founded a Non-Profit Organization entitled “The Future Speaks, Inc” where he will help the youth identify their purpose and set goals at an early age in order to avoid the many pitfalls that he couldn’t. His goal is to lead Millions to a more fulfilling place in their life and to leave a legacy behind him.

Follow Him on Twitter www.Twitter.com/TonyGaskins

Related posts:

1. People to Follow on Twitter: Bereolaesque
2. Transparency
3. Blog Love: Diddy Blog Coming Soon!

Blog readers get ready to add another blog to your blog roll!  Diddy announced his new blog this morning via Twitter

Check out the trailer for DiddyBlog.com

Follow him on Twitter www.twitter.com/iamdiddy

Related posts:

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Honestly, I’m tired of this debate that successful Black women can’t find a good man! It’s getting played out but with the media hype around the issue it is a harsh reality that some (not all) successful Black women face.

According to a recent Yale study, 43% of African-American women over the age of 16 have yet to be married, compared to only 23% of white women. There’s also a gap in numbers. The 2000 U.S. Census counted 1.8 million more African-American women than Black men. The statistics are so overwhelming that Sherri Shepherd, co-host of “The View” and author of “Permission Slips” headlined a panel of successful and single black men and women to debate the issue in the “Nightline Face-Off”: Why Can’t a Successful Black Woman Find a Man?

The debate took place at the Porter Sanford Center for the Performing Arts in Atlanta, by co-moderators Vicki Mabrey and Steve Harvey- relationship commentator and author of “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man.” A self proclaimed expert. Steve Harvey believes: “I’m an expert on the mindset of the male species (ROLLING EYES)

Joining Shepherd on the female side was Jacque Reid, star of VH1′s “Let’s Talk About Pep” (also known as the “Black version of Sex and the City”) Author of the Conversation: How Black Men and Women Can Build Loving, Trusting Relationships, Hill Harper and NPR contributor Jimi Izrael host the males side. Izrael is author of “The Denzel Principal,” a controversial book that says black women are searching for a prototypical man who only exists in their imaginations. Read the full article

hmmmm sideye….”What makes all these people relationship experts? ” I have strong opinions about this issue but I’ll save them for another time. What I will say is, we can debate and discuss relationships ALL day long until we are blue in the face but until you depend on GOD to bring you a mate, it won’t work. PERIOD!

Nightline Face-Off: Why Can’t a Successful Black Woman Find a Man?

Watch the debate on “Nightline” tonight at 11:35 p.m. ET

This should be interesting to say the least…Will you be watching?

Related posts:

1. Love Lockdown: Black Churches Are Why Black Women Are Single
2. Successful, Black, and Lonely
3. Love Lockdown: Bubble Butts, Big Muscles & Superficial Secrets Of Successful Relationships

AND THE WINNER IS…..

Kristin Daniels

Congratulations

You have 24 hours to respond to this post otherwise another winner will be chosen.

Thanks to everyone that entered! Stay tuned for the next TotalLifeProsperityBlog.com giveaway coming soon!

Related posts:

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Happy Friday Total Life Prosperity Readers! This FAB Friday edition is all about Mommy Fab! The new mom Paula Patton graces the double cover of Ebony Magazine’s May Issue by showing off the sexy side of motherhood!

In an exclusive photo shoot, the 34-year-old starlet personifies this month’s theme of Power of Possibility. What represents possibility more than motherhood? As she prepared for the birth of her son, Julian and the release of her new romantic comedy, Just Wright, Patton is living in the moment after she reached a career high in her role in the Oscar-winning film Precious. “I’m so thankful about the things that are happening in my career. Being pregnant has been a real lesson in taking every day as it comes. I don’t know what’s coming next,” she said.  Her husband, Robin Thicke, also chimes in on how the pregnancy has changed him and how fatherhood will affect his music.

Check out behind the scenes footage of the photoshoot

As an added bonus watch the trailer for her upcoming film, Just Wright starring Common (with his fine self) and Queen Latifah. I think this is going to be a cute romantic comedy!

HAVE A FABULOUS FRIDAY!

Related posts:

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by Toni Childs

I was having a conversation the other day with a friend and in the midst of her boasting about her “team” and listening to me whine about my lack thereof…she objected and started listing those that are currently trying out but haven’t been given the uniform. I quickly had to explain to her why they weren’t on the team and why they were more “booster club” material. Then I started thinking about the players that every single (not in a committed relationship) girl needs on her team. So here are my picks:

1. Kobe/Lebron- The big show. The main attraction. This is the one you prefer to have in the game at all times. He rarely disappoints. It’s always a good time. Unfortunately, there are road games or escapes to get it in in Colorado from time to time, so he’s not always available. So there’s got to be more players on the team…

2. Shaq- 2nd best compared to the big show. He’s a big name but bigger in stature, which is useful. He can move things, threaten people. He’s like your manly man. Your protection. The one you call for oil changes, to lift heavy things, and still makes a great date. Laid back-cool personality. Yeah he might have a side chick (or two) but he’s just a part of the team so there’s no trippin. He comes through when necessary.

3. Dwight Howard- Body sculpted by God himself. You keep him around if for nothing more than to have something to look at. Sometimes you’d prefer it if he didn’t speak, just stand there. But he can be fun. He’s your showpiece. Men have arm candy, why shouldn’t we? Just try to keep the  poor decision of a baby mama other women in his life at bay. He’s hot and there might be a little drama that comes with him, so keep the playing time limited.

4. Dirk Nowitzski- Jeezy keeps him one and you should too. The key thing about this player is that he’s versatile. He can play many positions and can actually be flexible to adjust to various situations. Your surroundings or his, he’s comfortable. Plus he can introduce to you to some folks you might not encounter on the reg. His background is a little different so he can expose you and your country arse to a few different things.

5. Nate Robinson- He’s unsuspecting because of his looks or demeanor, but surprisingly, he comes through in big ways sometimes.He’s the sleeper. The one you didn’t even think you’d have any interest in but gave it a try anyway. He’s got personality- its just not readily  apparent. He’s sweet. He’s actually a contender for the number one spot in an ideal world….but then there’s like one thing that keeps him from that spot. Somewhere he’s underwhelming.

6. Shelden Williams- This guy is just happy to be on the team. Not that he’s not a good catch. There’s nothing overly exciting about him, but he comes through in the clutch. He can step in and make a play if necessary. He’s your bench guy. Call on him when you need him. He’s a hard worker, doesn’t complain about his PT. He’s your no expectations, no fuss guy and just great to have around.

Then there’s these guys…

Booster club members- these are guys that tried out for the team, but lacked the things needed to suit up. They are were enthusiastic about the prospect of getting on the team, but there’s just no room for them. They can’t dribble, shoot, none of that. They do better in the stands- as support, or selling candy to raise money for uniforms or something. You can hang out with them on a platonic level for some time, but watch out, they may keep trying to step their came up and make that roster.

I stopped at six,because let’s be real, anymore that that number you’re probably considered somebody’s garden tool #imjustsayin. We know there’s a double standard for men and women and it certainly extends to the number of players on the team. And for women, the team really needs to be about Quality…not Quantity.

Did I miss a key player for every team? 

Is this too many players?

Fellas, what are the components of your team- or is it just a rack of women (quantity > quality)?

Guest Blogger ”Toni Childs” is a blogger for The Gifted Life.

Check her out at www.thegiftedlife.com

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